I want to, but I don't.
It's just that I have been down lately.
I don't know why.
Wait, I think I know why. I just feel so ALONE.
I laugh out loud, I still crack jokes, I still like doing the things I do...
But it seems like I have little hole in my heart now.
Is it because my grandmother died?
Is it because a lot of my work friends are leaving?
Is it because I have so much unresolved anger that I don't put out?
Is it just because I'm exhausted?
Is it because despite my efforts to reach to some people I still get turned down?
Or is it everything?
Sigh.
I'm just SAD (depressed?), I guess.
Sigh.
Ok I'll try going to sleep. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Letter to Shoti
I admire Shobe so much for having the unique talent of saying "GO AWAY" to Shoti who on an extreme scale tonight is desperately looking for a fight from either me or my sister. I'm so lucky Shobe is good at these things. I'm never good at telling people I hate (aka Shoti) to stop or to go away, in a discreet and strict manner. It's just weird that he doens't get it when you explicitly say "GO AWAY". Anyway, I have to learn how to do that. For now, I'll just pour my hatred for him tonight into this letter:
Dear Shoti,
1. My laptop is NOT broken.
2. Our (mine and Shobe's) PC is NOT slow or broken.
3. Stop making criticisms of our stuff to make your stuff look better. We have better electronics up keep than you do brotha, just admit it. Oh, and we all know you're just jealous.
4. We all know the reason you "lost" / "left" / "misplaced" your keys. We can see right through you you scaredy cat. You don't like coming home when it's dark and you have to pick which key to use. Because that takes time and a ghost might just surprise you. BRING YOUR DAMN KEYS WITH YOU.
5. Don't have money? You graduated dude. Seriously, look for a JOB. Don't tell me you can't spell that.
6. We are not born to assist you. Hire someone to do your bidding. Oh wait you have to have money to do that, go back to #5.
7. You're right, we're wrong. That's always the message right? Now, GO AWAY.
Love,
Atsi
Ahhh releasing anger is such a good practice. Why didn't I do this more often? I hate screaming even if it's him that I'm screaming at, because I hate myself right after that. This though is WAAAAAYYYYY better.
Dear Shoti,
1. My laptop is NOT broken.
2. Our (mine and Shobe's) PC is NOT slow or broken.
3. Stop making criticisms of our stuff to make your stuff look better. We have better electronics up keep than you do brotha, just admit it. Oh, and we all know you're just jealous.
4. We all know the reason you "lost" / "left" / "misplaced" your keys. We can see right through you you scaredy cat. You don't like coming home when it's dark and you have to pick which key to use. Because that takes time and a ghost might just surprise you. BRING YOUR DAMN KEYS WITH YOU.
5. Don't have money? You graduated dude. Seriously, look for a JOB. Don't tell me you can't spell that.
6. We are not born to assist you. Hire someone to do your bidding. Oh wait you have to have money to do that, go back to #5.
7. You're right, we're wrong. That's always the message right? Now, GO AWAY.
Love,
Atsi
Ahhh releasing anger is such a good practice. Why didn't I do this more often? I hate screaming even if it's him that I'm screaming at, because I hate myself right after that. This though is WAAAAAYYYYY better.
I'm Back!
Well, as if anyone cares.
But my blog is up again! (do I hear anyone clapping? I guess not.)
But my blog is up again! (do I hear anyone clapping? I guess not.)
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